Tarot - issues 11-15

BOOK 11

Just over 12 hours left... may God have mercy on my soul.

So this issue finishes up Tarot's vision quest, featuring a brief flirtation with the devil. Where the devil slips an imp into her pants... I am not making this up. This all seems rather at odds with what this whole book has been preaching. Women's sexuality is a good thing (They may say it in the most warped way possible but that is what they want to say), so why is the evil thing tempting her sexuality and by giving into she'll fail? Doesn't that seem kinda, well, stupid? They can't even get their message right for a 20 page issue. wow. Tarot dies (briefly) Raven morns and apologies (then tries to kill John, yeah real sorry she is), at which point Tarot comes back in shiny white armor that we will never see again. Raven makes out with Tarot (again, I wish I was kidding but I'm not) and then John does and then he is flown out of his pants and back to Salem by Raven. To her credit she doesn't kill him but still its just her being a dick.

High points: TENTACLES!! It's actually a pretty sad thing that I'm gonna count this as the 'high point' of the issue, especially since its one the bloody cover but the sheer ridiculousness of about seven different thorny rose vines reaching into her underwear is just like the utter shamelessness of Tarot we've come to know and... well... know at the very least.

Low points: Raven. I know I seem to be ragging on her a lot and this issues does to a bit seem to have her seeing the consequences of her actions but will continue throughout the series to show blatant disregard for the three-folds rule which has now almost killed her mother and her sister because of her. Seriously what a dick.

Fav Quote: Let the world drink from you milk of imagination (whilst someone paints nipples on her armor, and I gotta say that's where all my creative ideas come from too... just forget I said that)

BOOK 12

To FILLER AND BEYOND!!!!

This issue features none of the main characters. And I gotta say it's one of my fav's, pretty much just for that reason. This issues focuses entirely around Boo cat and Licorice Dust, speaking a bit about each of their origins. Starting with Boo cat who strips to transform and remembers the first time, (she transformed on Halloween the first time so her fur looks like a Jack-o-lanterns face) she then runs off to find a gift for her girlfriend and we see a pair of eyes watching her... hmm... at a rough guess I'm gonna say this ends up in a rape attempt, you know, something different for this series. Then we see Licorice who is visited by three other vampire cheerleaders. We find out that they goths at school, were rejected for the cheerleaders cause they were goth, met a vampire, transformed, killed the vampire and then went and killed the cheerleaders who made fun of them with rats.
Then back to Boo cat who is buying some oils for Dust and is attacked by a werewolf who, say it with me, wants to rape her! They fight and then she says on of the most forced empowering speech's for women ever. I would really like this speech about how it is a women's right to sleep with whoever she chooses and say no to whoever she chooses. If it wasn't for the fact that they feel the need to say it 3 fucking times. Twice in the fight and once when she wins. NO. Just once when she wins is all you need people. It would have been three times stronger to have her do that!!! Anyway, she goes back to meet Licorice and it turns out that her cheerleader friends are gifts for Boo cat and a five some begins. Thankfully here is where it ends.

High point: I gotta give some credit to Licorice here, when the vamp shows up they agree to be transformed and then he does the whole, now you are slaves for blah blah blah. At which point they seduce him while Licorice impales him from behind with a sharpened hockey stick. There are a lot of things I like about that.

Low point: Is every male in this either completely fucking useless or a rapists, seriously the world of magic seems to be filled with more perverts then central park and night. Needless to say I didn't enjoy the attempted rape. And I just realised how stupid that sounds.

Fav Quote: Your fruit is tender, your nectar warm. You are ripe for my picking. (I hope he pays attention when doctors say he also needs two fruit and five vegetables a day)

BOOK 13

The obligatory Chuckie episode. When you get right down to it there is never a magic story set in the real world that wont at one point or another use the haunted doll idea. Hell even Sailor moon did it, and whats more did it better then this.

Anyway, to skim the plot, a young doll maker is possessed by a haunter weegie bored and makes creepy dolls, John goes to her to have one of Tarot made, the girl dies, is brought back to life as a doll, by her... dolls. And then goes to kill Tarot so that she can have her body parts. Fight ensues and doll thing escapes with the promise to return. As far as I've read she hasn't yet sooo, this episode is kinda pointless.

High Points: ... A giant demonic teddy bear kicking the crap outta John, yeah, I like that part :)

Low Points: Tarot is fucking useless, seriously, she gets tied up by her stuffed animals. Yeah, this is our empowering female role model, she then gets her arse kicked by the doll lady herself. SHE IS A TERRIBLE FIGHTER!!!

Fav Quote: Well, since you showed me your pussy it's only polite of me to show you mine... (they're talking about her doll cat, what the hell did you think I was talking about)

BOOK 14

No... no! I think you've got this wrong. Empowering women, does not mean the sexual exploitation and quiet literally drug rape of men. That's not how it works.

So in case you didn't guess this issue has a lot of focus of Tarot's boyfriend John. The worlds most useless superhero and the comic relief figure for the series. He's like Merry and Pippen, if Merry and Pippen spent their time getting sexually assaulted by every female elf they came across. And have fun trying to get that out of your head.

This issue has the spring time celebration of Belentine. Where the main event seems to be John chasing Tarot through the forest to sleep with her. But because of some pesky pixies John wonders into the spirit world is kidnapped by some troll women for their queen, paint him green and drug him (that is the only way to look at it). He then in a drug haze he goes through the world having sex with various female characters with Tarot following just after woods. Now considering most of these characters are attractive some might say hey most men wouldn't mind but he literally does not know what is happening. When he cums he thinks its fireworks... I'M NOT KIDDING! Anyway Tarot saves him and takes him back to the party, still naked, he has no memory of it and they end kissing... how... romantic?

High points: Oh my god where can I begin on how little there is to enjoy in this issue. I kinda like that because of the celebrations Raven stops being a dick and even gives John a kiss... but I mean that's really scraping the bottom the barrel there.

Low points: RAPING MEN IS NOT FEMALE EMPOWERMENT!!

Fav Quote: And speaking of pickles, why is it pointing north? So far North! (From Tarot's mum, yeah you heard that right)

BOOK 15

More Filler.

This issue focuses on Crypt Chick, her still being upset at you know, being dead. She was having a great life preforming as a rock star in crosses. Just crosses, yeah that's pretty much all she wares. Anyway, threes this bit with a dinosaur, yes really. And then John makes a band of ghosts for the Crypt Chick to sing for.

High points: This episode was pretty unoffensive, you had Crypt Chick doing her usual thing and John doing something nice for a friend. Granted when on stage she does things with a microphone cord that probably shouldn't be done on stage unless your at a different kind of club.

Low points: This was pretty much just filler, no real point to it, the action wasn't that exciting. I liked that it was not offensive but at least to offensive issues are kinda more interesting.

Fav Quote: You never said they were dinosaur bones.